Planning versus Reality

As I have said before, a c-section wasn't my first choice. I had wanted to have a vaginal birth because of the benefits for the baby and because I wanted to experience what all woman talk about. Call me crazy but I wanted to feel the contractions, do the pushing and have that glorious moment when Matt cuts the cord and they hand her to me. Instead, I never really felt continuous contractions, didn't have to push, didn't have to decide whether to use drugs or not and Matt got to hold her first (which was fine). I felt like I cheated, like I took the easy way out. I know it was the best thing Having a c-section also scared me because it is major abdominal surgery. Surgery is scary in my eyes, so much can happen and the chance of infection=super scary. Here lately a few people that recently had babies had c sections and they ended up with infections. Umm super scary in my eyes.

The first time the doctor mentioned a c-section I was only 38 weeks and I expressed my intentions of wanting a vaginal delivery and he was fine with it. Somehow, when you are already sitting in a hospital bed hooked up to the monitors and they are talking about blood pressure and pre-eclampsia some how what you wanted goes out the window. At that point it was all about what was best for baby and after a talk with Matt and a few tears it was decided that the c-section was the best option.

Obviously I was going to be medicated but I was not prepared for the amount of fluid they were going to put into me via IV.  I am still swollen in my feet and ankles. They did have issues getting the spinal in but once they got it in it worked instantly. I could feel pressure but felt no pain. Matt was beside me and he got to peak over and he saw her when they pulled her out. A big plus of having the section was they sucked most of the stuff and things out of me so I don't have the bleeding like I would had I had a vaginal delivery. Now not to get too TMI but there is bleeding but it has been just enough to be annoying.

Recovery has been slower than I expected. My incision looks good and I had the staples removed last Monday. While I was at the doctors I got on the scale and from the last day I was pregnant till Monday I had lost 11lbs. I am excited to see as I continue to lose fluid. I can tell if I do too much so back to the couch I go. They did give me ibprofun and oxycodon to bring home but I only take those if absolutely necessary. Last night was the first night I slept in our bed. I had missed sleeping beside Matt. I had been sleeping in the recliner because it was easier to get in and out of.

Now, since I had a c section I will always be a c section unless we go to a bigger hospital. Another thing that I didn't want but once again it wasn't about me.

If you ladies could send some love to Laura @ The Adventures of an Infertile Myrtle who is starting a new cycle her third with a new doctor and Bird @ Bird Meets Bee whose due date is today! Plus Sass @ (In) Fertility Unexplained who is getting so close!